FIC: Dawning Light 6: Petit Soleil (PG) AB/BtVS

[mhalachai]

Dawning Light
A Buffy the Vampire Slayer/Anita Blake crossover
Chapter Six: Petit Soleil
by mhalachaiswords

Summary: Dawn fell from Glory's tower and into the portal. Now she's all alone and scared... but sometimes family comes from the strangest places.
Disclaimer: Buffy the Vampire Slayer belongs to Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy. Anita Blake belongs to Laurell K. Hamilton. No profit has been made from this fic, and the only benefit to me is personal satisfaction and the creative process. I hope you enjoy.
Rating: PG
Words: 6,100
Spoilers: So post-Danse Macabre it hurts.
Note: A response to the Mommy Anita challenge on TTH. More character development for Dawn. And we all know that never ends well.



~~~~~

"Is this her?"

Dawn looked up at the short blond man standing beside Nathaniel. "Who are you?" she demanded, closing the vampire magazine she had snuck out of Anita's room.

"This is Jason," Nathaniel explained, slipping past Jason into the kitchen. "He's going to hang out with us for a while."

Dawn bit her lower lip, regarding the grinning man. "I thought we were going to make cookies," Dawn said.

"We can still make cookies," Nathaniel said. He stopped behind Dawn's chair and gently took the magazine away from her. "Jason's my friend, we always spend time together on Tuesdays."

"Oh." Dawn tore her gaze away from Jason and put on her best pouty face. "Can I have that magazine back? Please?"

"This isn't a good magazine for you to read," Nathaniel explained.

"But it's about vampires!"

"That's what I mean." Nathaniel carried the magazine over to the counter by the phone. "What about those books we got at the library this morning?"

"Those are boring," Dawn informed him. "They're all patronizing and stuff."

Nathaniel frowned. "But you wanted to get them."

"Only because the librarian wouldn't let me play with the real books." Dawn scratched the skin below her healing wrist. "But I want to know more about vampires because they have ballets and stuff in this world. I mean city," she hastily amended. Had Nathaniel caught her slip of the tongue?

Nathaniel had that look on his face, the one he got when Dawn did something that wasn't normal for a kid. "If you want to look at Anita's books, you should do it when she's here," he said carefully. "So she can answer your questions."

Jason chuckled. "And it's not like she can't just wait until tonight to ask any vampire questions," he said.

Dawn whipped her head around. "What do you mean?"

Jason shrugged. "Jean-Claude's going to be coming by to pick Anita for their date at around six," he said. "You can ask him all kinds of questions about vampires then."

Dawn's jaw dropped open. Anita had a date with someone who wasn't Nathaniel or Micah? Nathaniel didn't seem upset by that news, or even surprised. "How is that allowed?" Dawn demanded. "And why would..." Dawn finally remembered why the name sounded familiar. "Jean-Claude? Like the vampire who ran that ballet last month? Anita's dating him?"

What the hell was with vampire hunters dating vampires? God, Anita was more like Buffy than Dawn had realized.

Jason was still grinning at Dawn. "They do more than date--"

"Jason," Nathaniel interrupted, an unfamiliar hard edge in his voice. It startled Dawn, as she had only ever heard Nathaniel speak in calm tones, or else be self-deprecating or bitter. Never so... adult. "Don't."

If Dawn had been startled, Jason was down-right floored. "I was just--"

"Stop it. She's five and doesn't need to hear this."

Dawn pressed her shoulder against the back of the chair, staying as still as she could. Nathaniel and Jason stared at each other, neither speaking, but on the edges of her mind, Dawn could hear smudged voices. She couldn't understand what the words meant, as if they were in a different language.

Then Jason looked away, and the words stopped.

Nathaniel turned to the cupboard and pulled out a pair of mugs. Jason leaned against the wall, a frown on his face as he looked at Dawn. He didn't seem mad, just puzzled.

A clinking sound drew Dawn's attention back to Nathaniel. Even from across the kitchen, she could see the tense set of his shoulders, the trembling in his hands as he poured coffee.

Dawn slipped out of her chair and shuffled over to Nathaniel. She only came up to his hip, so she couldn't give him a hug, but she leaned against his leg and watched while he poured the coffee.

Nathaniel finished filling the mugs and set the coffee pot down. He lifted Dawn up to his hip, waiting until she wrapped her arms around his neck before he picked up the two mugs with his other hand. He cleared his throat as he walked to the kitchen table. "Jason, can you get the cream and sugar?" he asked, not looking at the other man.

"Sure."

Nathaniel set the mugs down, then lifted Dawn back into her chair. He took the seat next to her, pushing the other cup in front of the empty chair where Micah usually sat.

Dawn stuck out her lower lip. "No coffee for me?"

Nathaniel smiled. "Not today."

"Hey, that was the best part of being four," Jason said as he set the cream on the table. "All sugared up and high on caffeine and nowhere to go."

"Dawn isn't four," Nathaniel corrected. "We think she's five."

"You think?" Jason took a sip from his cup, then added more sugar. "Why don't you just ask her? Hey, kid, how old are you?"

Dawn raised her eyebrows. She still didn't know what to make of Jason. He was a weird one. For some reason, he reminded her of Anya. "I'm fifteen," Dawn said.

Jason raised his own eyebrows. Dawn felt stupid. Of course he wasn't going to believe her.

"For extremely large values of five," Dawn added. Jason's expression just got blanker. "You know the old math joke? Two plus two equals five, for extremely large values of two?" Dawn rolled her eyes. "Come on, that's like the oldest joke in the world."

For some reason, Jason started laughing. "Is this why Richard was so freaked out yesterday?"

"You know Richard?" Dawn went up on her knees and leaned on the table. "How come you know Richard?"

"Just from around," Jason said, waving his hand. "Which reminds me, he told me to bring this over at some point." Jason reached into his back pocket and pulled out a packet of folded papers.

"What is it?" Dawn asked.

Jason unfolded the papers and tossed them across the table. "SAT prep tests. And man, you should have seen Richard yesterday," he added in an undertone to Nathaniel. "He was just in a bizarre mood when he came by the Circus."

Dawn pressed the papers flat on the table. Some of this stuff looked easy. "Who goes to a circus in the winter?" she asked.

"I do," Jason said with a grin. "I live there."

Dawn blinked at him. She couldn't tell if he was pulling her leg. Sneaking a glance at Nathaniel didn't help give her any clues. "You ran away to join the circus? I didn't know people really did that."

"That's the thing you'll need to know, young lady, if you stick around," Jason said in a mock-instructor tone. "Except the unexpected. Live the mystery, and all that bull-- all that stuff."

Dawn ignored the almost-swear. Buffy used to say worse things. Heck, Spike had taught her how to curse like an undead sailor. "How do you know Nathaniel?" she asked.

"Work." Jason drained the last of his coffee. "How do you know Nathaniel?"

"Wait, at work?" What was it that Zerbrowski had said Nathaniel did for a living? "You're a stripper?" she demanded.

Jason gave Nathaniel an incredulous stare. "You don't want me talking about Anita and Jean-Claude, and yet you told her about your job?"

"I didn't tell her about my job," Nathaniel protested.

"He didn't," Dawn said. She didn't want Jason thinking that Nathaniel had said anything wrong. "I heard someone say it."

"Uh huh." Jason didn't look convinced.

Nathaniel pulled his braid over his shoulder, fiddling with the elastic. "Dawn is... well, she's special."

"Like short bus 'special'?" Jason asked.

Dawn snorted. "Only in the way that you're special with a capital R."

Jason laughed again. "I like you, kid. You got brains."

"Thank you," Dawn said, unable to stop herself from smiling back.

Nathaniel stood up. "Do you still want to make cookies?" he asked Dawn.

"Okay."

"Can I lick the spoon?" Jason asked.

"Only if I get to lick the bowl," Dawn said immediately.

Jason stuck out his hand. "You've got yourself a deal."

~~~

"Does Micah know you're going out with a vampire?"

Anita finished hanging up her winter jacket and closed the closet door. "What are you talking about?"

Dawn crossed her arms over her chest and glared at Anita. "Jason said you had a date with a vampire tonight."

"I do." Anita rubbed her palms on her skirt. "And yes, Micah knows about it. As does Nathaniel."

"That's not fair!" Dawn exclaimed. "What about Micah and Nathaniel?"

Anita took a deep breath. "Dawn, this is between myself, Micah and Nathaniel, and it doesn't have anything to do with--"

"But why don't you just go on a date with them?" Dawn interrupted. "You don't need to date some poofy vampire."

Anita put her hands on her hips. "Dawn, I know you're young, but there is no need to make comments like that on someone's sexual orientation."

Dawn wanted to scream. "I was talking about his shirt! There was a picture of Jean-Claude in the paper yesterday!" She frowned. "But is he gay? Are you dating a gay vampire?"

Anita flung her hands up. "I'm not going to have this conversation, Dawn. I'm going out tonight with Jean-Claude, Micah and Nathaniel will be home with you, and that's the end of the story."

Dawn scowled and turned on her heel, stomping down the hallway on the way back to the kitchen. She moved the chair loudly and thumped her milk glass on the table, just for the heck of it.

It wasn't fair that Anita was going to go out with a vampire, not when she had two nice boyfriends here. Dawn liked Micah and Nathaniel, and she decided that she wasn't going to like Jean-Claude on principle.

He was probably all creepy like Dracula, too. He might look nice, but he probably had some weird accent, and bad teeth. Plus he wore stupid shirts.

Dawn picked up her pencil and went back to the math problem she had been working on before Anita came home. Jason had left after they finished making cookies, saying something about having to work that night. Nathaniel had said he needed to vacuum again, and so Dawn was left with the option of reading the childish books from the library, or working on the SAT test.

Six questions in, she had decided that the school curriculum in this dimension was grades behind where it was in Sunnydale. The test was challenging, but Dawn could work through most of the questions. It had been moderately entertaining, at least until Anita had arrived home.

Dawn told herself she wasn't angry that Anita wasn't going to be home that night. It was Anita's life, and Dawn didn't really have any right to tell her what to do.

Besides, this wasn't permanent.

Dawn swallowed hard against the sudden lump in her throat. She knew this wasn't her home, and Anita wasn't her family. For a little while that afternoon, she'd managed to forget that she was alone in this dimension.

A drop of water fell on the paper. Dawn dropped her pencil and rubbed angrily at her eyes. She wasn't going to cry like some stupid baby about how alone she felt. Even if that alone feeling was creeping up on her more and more.

I'm not five, Dawn told herself. I'm still as smart as I was before. I'm just shorter.

But was that true? Dawn made herself sit back and think. Was she acting like a teenager, or a little kid? How much of what she had been made the transfer to what she was now?

And why five? Dawn wondered. Why am I five now, when the monks made me fifteen in Sunnydale?

They had been so busy preventing Glory from ending the world, Dawn had never really questioned the why of her creation. The monks made her out of glowing green energy, but why this form? Why hadn't they made her into something super-strong like the Slayer? Why was she a girl and not a boy?

The monks had ensured that Buffy would protect her. Had they made Dawn a teenager on purpose? Why hadn't they made her five in Sunnydale? Would Buffy have wanted to protect a little kid as much?

Dawn looked down at her hands. They were small and soft. She'd used these hands to make balls of cookie dough, had pressed fingerprints into the dough before Nathaniel put the cookie sheets into the oven. These were her hands now, little hands that couldn't even hold a knife properly.

She was even less able to defend herself now than she had been in Sunnydale.

A shiver ran down Dawn's spine. The house was too quiet, even thought the vacuum cleaner was on upstairs, and the shower was running down the hall. Dawn glanced over her shoulder at the glass door at the end of the kitchen, almost expecting to see... someone. But there was no one there.

Dawn slid off her chair. She could hear Nathaniel walking around upstairs, and Anita had to be in the bathroom. No one would know what she was doing.

Dragging the chair across the kitchen was louder than Dawn expected. She waited, just in case, but no one came into the room. Holding her breath, Dawn climbed up and reached across the counter to pull a long knife out of the knife block. It was heavier than she expected. The last time she'd held a knife like this, was after she found out she was the Key, and she'd cut herself to see if there was any blood in her body.

Dawn blinked that memory away. Carefully, Dawn climbed down, holding the knife with the point down. She wanted to run, so no one would see her, but running with butcher knives was probably as dangerous as running with scissors.

Through the hall, up the stairs, and into her bedroom. Dawn closed the door quietly, so Nathaniel, who was vacuuming down the hall, wouldn't know what she was doing. The most logical place for the knife was under the mattress, she decided. No one would see it, and she could get to it easily if anything came into the room after her.

The bed was heavy. Dawn had to put the knife on the floor and use both hands to shift the mattress. The knife fit perfectly into the space, just underneath the pillow.

Knowing there was a knife under her bed, just in case she needed to protect herself, didn't make Dawn feel any better. If anything, she felt even more scared. In Sunnydale, she had Buffy around all the time to protect her. She missed that sense of security.

Outside the door, the vacuum stopped. Dawn quickly smoothed the blankets on the bed, then ran across the room and opened the door. Nathaniel was wrapping the cord around the vacuum. "Hi," he said when he saw Dawn.

"Hi." Dawn pressed against the doorframe. Would Nathaniel suspect that she'd stolen a knife? After he had been so adamant that she not touch knives?

Nathaniel looked at her for a long moment. "Are you okay?"

Dawn dropped her eyes to the carpet. She wanted to lie, but she couldn't do it, not when Nathaniel was looking right at her. "Sort of. I had a fight with Anita."

"About what?"

"About dating vampires." It wasn't a lie, and truthfully, Dawn was still a little angry at Anita about the whole subject.

Nathaniel set the vacuum down and knelt on the carpet. He let out a sigh. "Jean-Claude is a very important person in Anita's life," he said quietly. "They've been together for a long time."

Dawn fiddled with her sleeve. "How long?" she asked in a tiny voice.

Nathaniel smiled. "For longer than I've known Anita. Almost three years."

Dawn tried to wrap her head around that idea. "Then how come, if she was dating him before she met you, then you're living with her now? And Micah too?"

"It's just the way our lives are," Nathaniel said.

"Does it have anything to do with Anita being able to raise zombies?"

"A little bit." Nathaniel pulled one leg up to his chest and rested his chin on his knee. "But the thing about Anita is that she's always honest about what she's doing. We all know what's going on, and we're all fine with it."

"Really?"

"Of course," Nathaniel said. "What do you want to do tonight?"

"I don't know." Now Dawn was feeling awful about what she'd said to Anita. "Can we wait until Micah gets home to decide?"

"Of course."

Dawn shuffled her feet. "Do you think Anita is mad at me?"

"Why would Anita be mad at you?" Nathaniel asked.

"Because?"

Nathaniel shook his head. "I don't think Anita would be mad at you for any reason. Why don't you go down and talk to her?"

Dawn would rather have faced Buffy after she wrecked her sister's leather pants. "I guess."

She turned, dragging her feet all the way down the hall and down the stairs. She didn't want to apologize to Anita, didn't want to think about the knife hidden under her mattress, didn't want to be scared of always being alone.

Pushing those thoughts away, Dawn tapped on Anita's closed bedroom door. She stared at a tiny bubble in the paint near the doorjamb, half-hoping that Anita hadn't heard her knock.

The door opened inward. "Is something wrong?" Anita asked abruptly. She was in a bathrobe and her hair was swept up into a messy ponytail on her head.

"Nothing's wrong," Dawn whispered, staring at the carpet.

Anita touched Dawn's cheek, drawing her gaze upwards. "Are you sure?"

Her voice was calm now, not angry like it had been earlier. Dawn sniffled. "I'm sorry I said mean things about that vampire guy."

Anita's expression softened. "Hey, it's okay." She smoothed Dawn's hair back. "I shouldn't have been so abrupt like that."

"It's okay." Dawn glanced past Anita into the bedroom. "Are you getting ready for your date?"

"I am." Anita straightened up. "Do you want to come in while I get ready?"

Dawn nodded, and took Anita's outstretched hand. The woman led Dawn over the neatly-made bed and let her sit on the edge of the quilt.

Dawn looked around the room while Anita went to the closet. It felt sort of like Mom's room, safe and warm.

"What are you going to wear?" Dawn asked.

"That's a good question," Anita said from the closet.

"What are you going to do?" Dawn tapped her heels against the side of the bed frame. "Are you going to go to a movie?"

"No, we're going to dinner." Anita emerged from the closet holding a dark blue dress. "I guess this will work."

Dawn hopped off the bed and reached out for the dress. The fabric was silk-smooth against her fingers. "It feels nice," she admitted.

"It does," Anita said.

A faint shiver of uncertainty flitted through Dawn's mind. She frowned and looked up at Anita, who was still staring at the dress. "You can wear something else," Dawn said.

Anita shook her head. "No, this is fine."

Dawn wandered over to Anita's dresser while Anita stepped into the dress. The jewellery box was open, and Dawn looked at the contents with wide eyes. There were so many cool, shiny things in here. "You can poke around in there if you want," Anita told her.

Carefully, so she didn't break something, Dawn lifted a necklace out of the box. The chain was thin and delicate in Dawn's hand. She held up the necklace to the lamp and watched as the light shimmered through the sapphire pendant.

A knock sounded on the bedroom door. "Anita," Nathaniel said, "Jean-Claude is here."

"I'll be out in a few minutes," Anita called as she zipped the dress up her back. She came over to the dresser and began sorting through her makeup. "Do you like that one?" she asked Dawn.

Dawn nodded, and held the necklace out. "It would go perfect with your dress."

Anita took the chain. "You're right, it would."

Dawn watched quietly as Anita put the necklace around her throat. It all seemed so normal, Dawn could hardly believe that less than half an hour ago she had stolen a knife and put it under her bed, like some warped version of the Princess and the Pea. Well, if she could say 'normal' when a vampire was waiting to take Anita out for dinner. However that worked.

"Do you love him?" Dawn asked suddenly.

Anita glanced down. "What?"

"Do you love Jean-Claude?" Dawn pressed. "Nathaniel said you've been with him for years. Do you love him?"

Anita's hand slowly closed around her purse. "Why are you asking?"

Dawn didn't really know why she was asking, but she had to know. She settled on giving Anita a shrug.

Anita put her hand on Dawn's shoulder. "Me and Jean-Claude... it's complicated. Really complicated."

"But you love, him, right? You'd have to, to stay with him for so long. Right?"

The whole house seemed to hold its breath while waiting for Anita to answer. Finally, Anita gave a short nod. "Yes, I do love Jean-Claude."

Dawn smiled, big and wide, never minding that the feeling of relief that flooded through her head didn't belong to her. She flung her arms around Anita's waist and hugged the woman tightly, then peeled away before Anita could react.

Anita cleared her throat. "Why don't you go find Nathaniel, I have a couple of things to do before I come out. Okay?"

"Okay." Dawn darted across the room and slipped out of the door, leaving Anita behind. She thought she heard Nathaniel's voice in the living room. He was probably talking to the vampire guy, Dawn thought as she slowed down, hesitating outside of the room. She suddenly felt a little scared, not of being alone, but of the fact that there was a vampire in the living room.

But Nathaniel was in there, and Anita would have said something if it was dangerous. Dawn had to believe that.

Dawn peeked around the wall. Nathaniel was sorting books by the TV. The vampire was sitting on the couch, motionless as the dead. He was even prettier in person, with his hair falling past his shoulders, his pale skin as perfect as marble, and not a poofy shirt in sight.

Then he moved, a quick twist of the head. It was too quick to be possible, like in those Japanese horror films Dawn wasn't supposed to have seen. The vampire stared at Dawn with eyes the same colour as Anita's sapphires.

Dawn stared back. She wasn't scared of him, she told herself. He was just a vampire, and she knew other vampires. He wasn't that scary. And that didn't have anything to do with the fact that he might have been the most perfect creature Dawn had ever seen in her entire life, she told herself.

"You must be Dawn," the vampire said, sitting forward. His French accent slid across the room like warm molasses.

"Yes," Dawn said, coming around the corner slowly. "Are you Jean-Claude?"

"Oui, mon petit soleil," Jean-Claude said. He smiled at her, lips neatly closed. "It is indeed good to meet you, I have heard so many things."

"Who from?" Dawn asked, stopping in her tracks. Who had been talking to this vampire about her?

"From Anita," Jean-Claude said. "She speaks most highly of you. As well, Jason told me of his visit this afternoon."

"You know Jason?" Dawn bit her lip. "Do you live at the circus too?"

"I do," Jean-Claude said. Dawn had the distinct impression that she was amusing him. "Jason is one of my companions."

Memories of Dracula danced in Dawn's head. "Do you mean minion?" Dawn demanded. "Does he call you Master? Do you make him eat bugs?"

Jean-Claude stared at her for a heartbeat, then he laughed. "No, I do not make Jason eat bugs," he said after a minute. "Although he will eat anything that appears before him, that one."

Dawn wanted to be angry at Jean-Claude for laughing at her, but hearing his laughter made all her annoyance fade away.

"Indeed, mon petit soleil, I have brought you a small token of welcome to St. Louis," Jean-Claude continued. He held out his hand to her, empty and open.

Dawn glanced at Nathaniel, who nodded silently. She carefully moved closer to Jean-Claude, still not convinced this was a good idea, and stopped out of reach.

Like a magician, a long flat box suddenly appeared in Jean-Claude's hand. He held it out to her with a flourish. "For you."

Dawn inched forward and took the present from his palm. She quickly ripped the golden wrapping paper off the case and opened the lid. Inside lay a shiny silver fountain pen.

"This is for me?" Dawn squeaked, forgetting that she was supposed to be on her guard against the vampire. "Really?"

"Of course." Jean-Claude didn't look nearly so scary now. In fact, he was a bit like Angel. Not scary at all.

"Thank you," Dawn said, suddenly shy.

"You are most welcome, mon petit soleil."

"What does that mean? What you're calling me?" Dawn asked, holding her new pen close. She couldn't wait to try it out on her journal.

"It means, 'my little sunshine'," Jean-Claude explained.

Dawn edged around the room to Nathaniel's side, and tugged in his sleeve until he leaned down. "Does sunshine hurt vampires?" she whispered in his ear.

He nodded, putting his arm around her and drawing her close. "It burns them."

Dawn looked back at Jean-Claude, still sitting causally on the sofa. "You've got weird nicknames for people," she told him.

Jean-Claude placed his hand over his heart in a dramatic gesture. "My apologies."

Footsteps sounded down the hall. "Sorry I'm late," Anita said breathless, hurrying into the room. She had fixed her hair and put on a little more makeup, and Dawn thought she looked beautiful. "I just talked to Micah, he's having problems with Violet and he's not going to be able to get home for a while."

"We'll be okay," Nathaniel said. "Dawn and I will have a good night."

"We will!" Dawn agreed.

Anita looked hard at Nathaniel. "Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"Okay, fine. We'll be back before midnight." Anita turned, and seemed to finally realize that Jean-Claude was watching her. "Sorry, hi."

Jean-Claude rose from the couch in a slow, graceful movement. He crossed the floor to Anita's side, where he carefully laid his hands on her shoulders, then lowered his head to kiss her gently on each cheek. "Good evening, ma petite."

Dawn watched, fascinated, as Anita blushed. "Come on, we're going to be late."

"No time spent in your presence is wasted," Jean-Claude murmured as he placed his hand on her lower back.

She shot him a glare. "Stop it."

"As you wish, ma petite." Jean-Claude bowed and vanished into the hallway.

Anita shook her head. "Nathaniel, if you guys need anything, you call me or Micah, or even Merle."

"We'll be fine," Nathaniel said, picking Dawn up.

"We sure will!" Dawn grinned widely at the flustered expression on Anita's face. "Have fun!"

Anita shook her head again, but she didn't say anything as she crossed the floor and gave Nathaniel a kiss on the cheek. "I'll be back tonight," she told Dawn. "Promise."

Dawn nodded hard. Anita smiled at her, then leaned in to press a kiss against Dawn's hair. Anita smelled like perfume and soap, and that smell was beginning to be familiar to Dawn. "Bye, Anita."

Jean-Claude reappeared with Anita's coat. "Come, ma petite."

Dawn waited until the front door closed behind Anita and Jean-Claude before poking Nathaniel in the shoulder. "What?" he asked.

"When Jean-Claude calls Anita ma petite? What does that mean? My little what?"

Nathaniel's face went blank. "I... don't know."

Dawn rolled her eyes. "Vampires are weird."

~~~

Something woke Dawn up. She sat upright in her bed, pushing the covers back. Straining to hear, she couldn't tell what had startled her awake. Was it a nightmare? She couldn't remember.

What time was it? Dawn didn't have a clock in her room, but it didn't feel too late. She and Nathaniel had been watching a movie, and she must have fallen asleep on the couch. He must have brought her up and tucked her in.

Dawn rubbed at her eyes as she slipped out of bed. The floor was cold under her feet, but she didn't remember where she left her slippers. But she didn't mind cold feet. Especially when she was thirsty.

The house was quiet as she snuck out of her bedroom. She bypassed the bathroom, as sink water was always gross. She was quiet as she tiptoed down the stairs, not wanting to bother Nathaniel. The faint sounds from the living room told Dawn that Nathaniel was still probably watching TV.

Dawn paused at the living room door and peeked inside. Nathaniel was on the couch in an awkwardly boneless position, his eyes closed. From this angle, Dawn couldn't see him breathing.

A trickle of cold wormed its way around her stomach. It was fine, Dawn told herself. Nathaniel was just sleeping. She could wake him up if she needed anything.

Dawn continued down the hall toward the kitchen. The walls around her absorbed all sound, until it was as if she wasn't there at all. She turned the corner into the kitchen, and stopped dead.

There was a vampire in the middle of the kitchen.

Dawn couldn't breathe, couldn't move. She was caught in the vampire's gaze, green eyes so bright, so alien. His blood-red hair spilled over his shoulders as he focused on Dawn.

The moment stretched into an eternity. The vampire was as still as Jean-Claude had been, but this sort of stillness was more dangerous, like a snake waiting before it struck.

Dawn wanted to scream for Nathaniel, but she couldn't open her mouth. Belatedly, she realized why Nathaniel was lying in such a strange position. The vampire must have killed him first and was waiting for someone else to eat!

Panic and fear swept over Dawn, so hard it cramped her stomach. Nathaniel was dead and Anita wasn't there and nothing would save Dawn from dying like Nathaniel had.

The vampire took a step towards Dawn, and the moment shattered. Dawn whirled around and ran as hard as she could, down the hall, up the stairs, toward her room and the only weapon she had. With every step, she expected to be grabbed from behind, to feel vampire fangs sinking into her skin, ripping her apart, killing her for her blood.

Dawn made it through her bedroom door. Some fragment of common sense remained in the tattered fears of her head, and she narrowly avoided slamming the door. She didn't want the vampire to know where she was.

The room was still too empty for her to have any cover. There were no chairs to shove in front of the door, not that a vampire would let a chair stop him.

Quickly, Dawn scrambled across the room and pushed at the mattress until she could grab the sharp butcher knife. She backed up, shivering and so close to tears it hurt her throat. Where could she hide? She'd backed herself into a room, with only one way out. Two if you counted the window.

Dawn looked at the window. It was a two-story drop to the snow, and she didn't have any shoes. She couldn't jump with the knife, either. That left the closet.

Dawn pushed her way into the closet and pushed the door closed again. She could see the room through a crack in the wood. Gripping her knife tight, Dawn crouched down, never taking her eyes off the door.

Now, in the quiet, Dawn couldn't fight the other memories pushing at her head, of Nathaniel lying in an unnatural position on the couch. He was dead, he had to be. And Dawn hadn't done anything to save him.

Grief overwhelmed Dawn. Everyone she loved died or got hurt. Mom, Tara, Buffy, and now Nathaniel. The vampire might be after Dawn next, and there was nothing she could do to protect herself.

The night stretched on forever. It grew colder and colder in the closet, and Dawn's hands numbed until she could hardly hold the knife. But she wasn't going to sleep, not until sunrise and she knew the vampire was gone.

Something creaked in the hallway, and Dawn stopped breathing.

The door to her bedroom opened quietly. A dark shape crossed the room silently, moving toward the bed. Vampire, vampire! Dawn's mind screamed at her. She gripped the knife handle so tightly that the wood bit into her hand.

The vampire laid a hand on the bed, then yanked the covers back. "Dawn?"

It wasn't a vampire. It was Anita.

"Dawn?" Anita said again, her voice growing frantic. She dropped to her knees to look under the bed. "Dawn, where are you?" Anita demanded as she rushed to the window, tested the latch.

Dawn was so relieved that it wasn't a vampire that she let go of the knife with a clatter and fell back to the ground. The next moment, the closet door was opening. "Dawn?" Anita pulled Dawn into her arms. "Why are you in the closet?"

Dawn clung to Anita, burying her face in the woman's neck. She couldn't speak.

"You're freezing," Anita muttered. "Did you have a bad dream?"

Dawn made herself pull back and shake her head. "There was a-- a vampire," she stuttered out. "In the house."

Anita's eyes went wide. "What?" She pushed the hair back from Dawn's neck. "Are you okay? What are you--"

"It ate Nathaniel." The words burned as they came out of her mouth.

Anita's hand stilled on Dawn's shoulder. "What? Nathaniel's fine."

"No he's not!" Dawn shrieked. "It killed him and it was going to kill me!"

"Dawn, you're safe, there are no vampires in the house," Anita tried to say.

"There was so! He was big and tall and he had hair like blood and he was in the kitchen!"

Something shifted in Anita's eyes. "Dawn, you have to listen to me, okay?" she said quietly. "That vampire wasn't going to hurt you, he's a friend of mine."

"No, he's not!" Dawn struggled free of Anita's grip. "He's a vampire and he's big and bad and he killed Nathaniel and you can't have vampire friends because they kill everyone!"

Anita reached out for Dawn, but Dawn kept moving back until she was at the back of the closet. The light from the room flashed silver against the butcher knife on the floor.

Anita froze, hand outstretched over the knife. "Where did this come from?" she asked, voice as cold as ice.

Dawn pressed her back against the closet wall and didn't answer.

Footsteps pounded down the hall. Nathaniel rushed into the room, breathing hard. "What's wrong?" he asked.

Nathaniel wasn't dead. The vampire hadn't eaten him, and one more person wasn't dead because of Dawn.

The world went grey around the edges, and Dawn slid down the wall. She started crying, little sobs that she couldn't stop.

"Nathaniel, please take this knife back downstairs," Anita said. She lifted Dawn into her arms and carried the unresisting girl over to the bed. "I'm going to stay up here tonight."

Dawn was so cold, so scared, and even knowing that the Nathaniel wasn't dead, that the vampire in the kitchen wasn't going to hurt her, didn't make it any better. Anita sat on the edge of the bed, smoothing Dawn's hair back, rocking her as she cried. "Dawn, I'm so sorry," Anita whispered.

"There was a vampire in the kitchen," Dawn said again. The images lurking in the back of her head didn't involve vampires, only big shoulders and broken glass and so much fear and pain. "He wanted blood."

"I'm never going to let anything hurt you," Anita promised, holding Dawn tight.

"There was a vampire in the kitchen," Dawn whispered, staring straight ahead but not seeing.

... to be continued