Sticks and Stones and A Girl Like Her (Switchback missing scene)

[mhalachai]

Sticks and Stones and A Girl Like Her
Switchback missing scene
An Anita Blake Fanfic story
by Mhalachai

Summary: Jean-Claude is slipping away from Anita, and she doesn't know how to hold on.
Disclaimer: Anita Blake belongs to Laurell K. Hamilton. No profit has been made from this fic.
Rating: PG-13
Words: 322
Missing Scene: #36 - Guilt.
Note: This missing scene takes place deep into Switchback. I was hit on the head last night by the Lyrical Fairy. I'll put it like this: Anita's not doing so good in the Switchback world. Lack of capitalization and punctuation done on purpose.

~~~~~

There's a bite to the breeze, sharp as fangs skimming over skin, sinking just deep enough to bleed her and steal the sounds that she will not let fall from her lips.

he told her to go

He once asked her, he but not him, what she had to live for and she ignored the question like she did every question that touched on then, pushed away the lost little girl she had become as she pulled him closer, just a little closer.

All she is, all she has become, boils down to turn your head, don't let them see you cry the sticks and stones that make up a girl like her.

She used to think she was herself, good little girl, pure and righteous, better than the men she aims her gun at, than the things that creep in the dark, that hide under the bed, that rip and tear and destroy.

she never created anything, cold barren dead thing

She used to listen when he said she was better.

it's all different now, different lines and different lies and a different man staring at her with Jean-Claude's eyes and making her cry (out) with Jean-Claude's honeyed tongue but she's the same as she's always been, death and destroyer and colder than the things she aims her gun at

The difference, this time, is she hears the liar in her head, whispering wicked words in her sleep. The difference, this time, is that he wants the lie, not the truth of her.

She doesn't want to know that he believed that she was better. She doesn't want to know that he can see her lies.

She doesn't want to leave.

She has no reason to stay.

he told her to go. he didn't mean forever

Forever is all she has left.

he walked away first

There's a bite to the breeze as she turns and walks, alone, into the darkness.

--fin

Comments

[thymidinekinase.livejournal.com]

Anita seems to be in a bad head space. Given the way Switchback has been going for her, that's not too surprising. I take it you've got Switchback plotted out pretty far?

[mhalachaiswords.livejournal.com]

Yes, I have Switchback plotted out to the very end. The only reason I haven't any more written is that the story is so damned depressing that it's hard to motivate myself to write it.

[sabriel-0405.livejournal.com]

I'll take even missing scenes from Switchback. You make me want to write Aftermath even though it is set in the present rather than in a time I don't have the grammar to describe.

[firefox1490.livejournal.com]

:( Anita seems so sad but it figures with the way that Switchback has been.

[goldenrat84.livejournal.com]

Despair, this fic is much with the depressing.

[practical-puss.livejournal.com]

Aw. She fucked up. I feel so, so bad for, practically, everyone in that fic.

[penyn-1600.livejournal.com]

Poor Anita is so hopeless here.

[scarecrow226.livejournal.com]

You really are my hero. This piece summarizes Anita's perspective in Switchback, something I'm looking forward to the continuation of, along with Inevitable.
It's writers like you who make it worth it to wade through the waist deep shite out there.
I have to say that Inevitable is equal to the Home Fries Nazi story in the Best Story Ever spot.

[mhalachaiswords.livejournal.com]

ZOMG another fan of Home Fries Nazi! Now I'm going to be reading that all night! I love this story.

And after that little squee, I want to say thanks so much for your kind words. Writing Inevitable and Switchback, such complicated stories, is facinating and heart-wrenching also, but it's not something I can ever give up. Writing is life :)

[scarecrow226.livejournal.com]

I'm actually reading another one all night, it's called Courage I think, it's really interesting... though really fucked up and angsty.
http://www.thebejeweledgreenbottle.com/OLYMPICS%20FICS/TEAM%20ANGST%20-%20COURAGE.htm

Another one is Pariah
http://archive.skyehawke.com/story.php?no=4406&chapter=1&font=&size=
*shrugs* They're interesting.
I love writing, but I can only do it occasionally. I love reading more :D

[neo-trinityknot.livejournal.com]

I had to butt in and say Home Fries Nazi is awesome! I love stories like that and yours that make me stay up late into the night, not even realizing it. (case in point it is 12:30 sunday, I have class in the morning, and I was re-reading your stories!)

I'm glad that you have Switchback plotted out. Gives me hope I will see more someday, cause I'm a greedy little chapter whore!

[mhalachaiswords.livejournal.com]

I swear, I can re-read Home Fries once a month and never get tired of it. (And I hate to say this, but I sometimes get caught up in my own stories. Not sure if that qualifies as Too!Much!Ego! but I got stuck on Inevitable and am now 8 chapters in. I'm never going to get to sleep.

And as for Switchback... it's all plotted, out to the bitter, bitter end. I love the story but it's so sad that I can't write it often... I do hope to get back to it soon, however :)

[ktoth04.livejournal.com]

so switchback is something of yours i hadn't gotten around to reading yet... but omg, i just read it all, and... idk... you make me actually wanna go and read ab again? and edward! god i miss edward in canon.... pls pls pls do not let the depressingness get to you, the story is fascinating!

[houses7177.livejournal.com]

Gah, heartbreak in lyrical form. What a harsh view Anita has of herself here, but no harsher than the view she has of the rest of the world. Compelling in despair.

[alydhe.livejournal.com]

I think Switchback is going to leave me bleeding on the floor when it's done. *sigh*

Poor Anita, why do I get the feeling she's either going to be cold and alone or dead in the end? It's really sad when the monster in the closet is in there, because he's hiding from you.

[triscut2.livejournal.com]

Mhalachai, please tell me that we will have a new Switchback chapter soon. *down on knees* After reading this scene I went back and read the posted chapters again this afternoon - at least the 3rd time that I read it - and it still grabs me, angst and all.

[mhalachaiswords.livejournal.com]

The problem with Switchback is that it's so depressing. Although, with my current annoyance with canon Anita, it may be the tonic I've been looking for.

Hrm. Maybe that will get me back to writing AB. I will investigate this :)

And thanks so much for your kind words!

hope

[midnightblue-8.livejournal.com]

Hello! Switchback was one of the fics which I've read when I started to read AB fanfictions. I'm not English, so it was a bit difficult, but I loved it very much. It's still one of my favourites and it's so bad you didn't continue. But I hope you will. Good luck for it!

Re: hope

[mhalachaiswords.livejournal.com]

Hi there :) I'm glad you liked the story so much. I am planning on continuing it in the new year - I think it's time to pick it up again.

Re: hope

[midnightblue-8.livejournal.com]

Hello!
It's great you're planning to continue *happy jumping*
One quiestion.. Are you going to update it on PDS or should I look after the new chapter on your LJ?
Thanks for answering me :)