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mhalachaiAt AO3
Summary: Natasha Romanoff tries to reconnect with her son. This is understandably easier said than done.
Rating: PG-13
Characters: Natasha Romanoff, John Sheppard. Now with bonus Rodney McKay.
Notes: Thanks for beta help to
websandwhiskers. Someone's been making a family video (end of Stargate Atlantis Season 1 - Letters from Pegasus).Follows Widow's Weeds, Widow's Flight, Widow's Son.
<< Part Five
Jan. 12, 2005
The video, not identified as anything particular, was waiting in her inbox when she powered up her computer.
Natasha set down her coffee cup, mentally girding herself for another day of paperwork while Nick Fury decided on her next undercover mission. He still wasn't speaking to her again after her little stunt in Hong Kong.
Natasha expected that the video could be many things; SHIELD paperwork, or the random baby goats Clint had been sending her all week.
She was completely unprepared when the video clip opened on John Sheppard's face.
Natasha made an undignified squeak, setting her mug down with too much force and spilling coffee everywhere, but she didn't care, it didn't matter. John was alive. Six months later and John was alive.
John looked directly into the camera and smiled. He looked tired and worn and even thinner than before, years and responsibility weighing on his shoulders. But he was smiling.
"So, hey," he said. His voice was rough and low, so different from the happy little boy Natasha still carried around in her memories. "It's me, John, your... uh, John."
Natasha curled up in her chair, never taking her eyes from the computer screen. Her chest hurt with something she didn't want to identify.
"I'm still kicking, which is better than some," John said, losing the hint of humor in his voice. "We've had a tough time of it, but mostly we're okay."
Which translated to, we've lost people and I couldn't save them.
"If your security clearance is anything like Coulson's, I can't go into details," John went on. "But, pretty early on, we lost the military commanding officer, so I've been the ranking officer around here for the balance of the time." He made a face. "You can guess how well that went down with the Marines."
On screen, John rolled his shoulders, that mix of pride and faint embarrassment she remembered from Oklahoma.
"But things are interesting. Not like Afghanistan. And not like Antarctica. Just... different."
He paused, his eyes losing focus for a moment.
"I'm not entirely sure when we'll be coming back," he said carefully, and Natasha knew that tone well, trying to work some information around an important cover story. "But I wanted you know that I'm doing okay, and that, you know. Sometimes I think of you."
He rubbed the back of his neck, sheepish and embarrassed, and Natasha pressed her hand over her mouth so she wouldn't make a sound. She was not going to cry.
"So yeah, this is the place," he continued, waving a hand at the room around him. Natasha took in sweeping walls, soft colors, nothing at all like the secret bunkers or underground lairs Natasha associated with such secrecy. "Not bad, a bit of a fixer-upper, but once we got rid of the dead plants--"
Into the frame burst a man, wearing a jacket similar to John's, save for the Canadian flag on the shoulder. "The plasma ducts on the tower level are making weird noises, I need you in the chair now--" the man said rapidly.
John glared. "What's wrong with you, I'm filming a video!" he exclaimed.
"This is important--"
"You talked for like a fucking hour, McKay, I'm trying--"
"Does your American English have a different definition for important? Do you want the ZPM to start a feedback loop with the naquada generator--"
John jabbed the man in the ribs, eliciting a loud "ow!" and a subsequent silent accusatory glare. John pointed at the camera. "I am recording a video for my cousin Nat," he said through clenched teeth. "Who doesn't have my security clearance."
The man McKay looked at the camera as if he'd never seen one before. "Oh. Hi, Sheppard's cousin Nat." He frowned. "You never said you had a cousin."
John rolled his eyes. "Everyone has cousins, even me."
"But you never said you had a cousin," McKay pressed.
"Because I share so much about my family life?" John demanded. He took McKay's arm and manhandled him out of the shot. "I'll be there in ten minutes, don't blow up my city!"
"No promises!" McKay yelled. John cleared his throat, straightened his shoulders, and posed once against in front of the camera.
"As I was saying," he said calmly, and Natasha couldn't stop from smiling at his demeanor, "This is a nice place. Good people, really good." He paused. "I made the right call in coming out here," he said, suddenly serious. "I needed to come out here. You know how it is, sometimes you don't think you've made the right call, but in the end you see that you did." He nodded. "So, I'll try and make it home, and I'll let you know when I do."
He smiled again, the expression never reaching his eyes, before walking over to the camera. He reached up, then backed up and bent over so his face filled the entire shot.
"That last bit wasn't some kind of historical family commentary, by the way." He blew a kiss at the camera and the screen went dark.
Natasha took a shaky breath, feeling like she could properly breathe for the first time in six months.
John wasn't out of the woods yet, but he was alive and he was doing well and he was a fighter, a survivor, and she could believe that she would see him again one day.
And because she was Natasha Romanova, the Black Widow, who never let anything escape her attention, she opened the video again to see if she could find any hints as to John's location and those unfamiliar devices the man McKay mentioned, a "zed-pee-emm" and "naquada".
end part six