Inevitable 14

[mhalachai]

Inevitable 14: That is not dashed with pain and weariness and fault; I crave the stain is up, posted and ready for your eager eyes.
At TTH
At Pomme de Sang
At Skyehawke

Please, I crave your feedback let me know what you think.

I'm starting to understand why we never see a lot of the supporting characters in LKH's fics. I've got... *counts* 16 characters on screen at one point in this monstrosity. It's unpleasant. You end up having people stay silent a lot, which seldom happens in real life. Gah.

Other thoughts... I'm not sure what to do with Micah. I've got this thing that I'll probably never explore in fic, that of all the people in Anita's life, Richard is the one that will make Micah jealous. Everyone else... Nathaniel's a sub, Damian's Anita's property, JC's the Master, and Asher belong to JC. Micah can deal with them all, but Richard's a new category. He's an alpha male, who has demonstrated himself hard-put to share Anita's affections. It is in this mindset that I write In.14.

Those who are wondering about Anita's mental state.... all I can say it, keep wondering.

Comments

[deepfishy.livejournal.com]

Wonderful, as always. It's obviously not going to be an easy road for either Harry or Anita (but when has it ever been?).

Noticed one small typo: "...stairs at the Dursleys' house in England. He'd have to make due with what he could find here."

And incidently, "absolute pants" is now my favourite phrase. So very British :)

[ravenfrog.livejournal.com]

New to your story, came in on a rec from beren_writes. I read the whole thing tonight, and wanted to let you know I thought it was fabulous. I was intrigued by your story I've spent the last few hours looking for other HP/AB crossovers with length and plot, a new interest for me.

[sabriel-0405.livejournal.com]

I thought this was a great chapter. I also agree with you about Richard. Micah's been very good about Richard so far but I think the events of ID have the power to change that. She's Nimir-Ra to his Nimir-Raj but once again she's lupa to Richard's ulfric. That's got to hurt. Micah isn't perfect. He's just used to controlling his emotions. I see that as getting much harder.

[mhalachaiswords.livejournal.com]

Noticed one small typo *shakes head* You'd think that a freaking copy-editor would find that, but noooo.

And "absolute pants"... I almost had him swearing up a storm, but Harry's still enough of a kid to not want to swear in front of his elders. But give him a few weeks with Anita and he'll be swearing like a sailor.

[taligator.livejournal.com]

Excellent update!

I think you've encountered what LKH has, that too many characters is not easy to deal with and you end up leaving them out because they have nothing valuable to add to a story. I also think that your line about not knowing what to do with Micah is excellent - Micah in many ways replaced Richard in Anita's life and I for one would love to see those two go at it because Richard is (to me as well) the one that would make Micah jealous and have him show emotion outside his normal laidback ways.

As for the story, I have to agree, "absolute pants" is the best description I've hard in a long time, I loved it.

I find Anita's behavior to be spot on, she rarely cares about her own injuries in light of others. I like the bit at the end with Damian and Harry, it was the start of a relationship between them and you handled it nicely.

I have to admit that I love that Anita was hurt by cruciatus. So often she's portrayed as almost impervious to pain and it's nice that something broke through that. I don't like that she's in pain but I like that she came up against something she couldn't bad ass her way through. It'll be interesting to see what the long term side-effects of this are and how it changes her relationship with Harry. I think the last line at the end of the previous chapter, her staring at Harry, was very telling.

Thanks again and looking forward to watching this story continue to evolve.

[mhalachaiswords.livejournal.com]

Hey, glad to have you here :) I only know of one other HP/AB crossover, which Beren also recced back in the day.... I don't think it's been updated in forever, though.

[mhalachaiswords.livejournal.com]

Micah isn't perfect

True, and I think what some people don't like about him is tat to this point in the series, he's looking too perfect. He needs a major flaw, something to make him more human. I hope that either the novella or the next book addresses that, because damnit, I like Micah.

[mhalachaiswords.livejournal.com]

Excellent update!
*beams* thanks!

"absolute pants"

That phrase... I'm still in love with it. So Harry and so very British.

I find Anita's behavior to be spot on, she rarely cares about her own injuries in light of others.

And more so in this case, when she's convinced that she's the reason everyone's hurt. More so with Nate, but Jamil to a certain extent. Poor girl.

So often she's portrayed as almost impervious to pain and it's nice that something broke through that.
Do you mean in fic or the books?

I think the last line at the end of the previous chapter, her staring at Harry, was very telling.

You, my dear, have caught my very subtle attempt at foreshadowing of a sort :P. Stay tuned

[sabriel-0405.livejournal.com]

I've loved Micah since he stepped on stage. I don't see him as perfect. One of the things that Laurell said is that Micah has enough self-confidence that he isn't threatened by Anita's need for control. But I see jealousy raring its ugly head about Richard. Micah is in love. Sharing her has to be painful. I am definitely hoping the novella gives us more. I am very excited for that.

[mhalachaiswords.livejournal.com]

Sharing her has to be painful.

I just thought of something... in all of the situations she currently has going on, Micah really is "sharing", i.e. he's either there with her and whoever, or has the option to be (well, minus the JC/A/A trio, but like I said, Asher "belongs" to JC and so it's an off-shoot of the JC/Anita thing). But we can all guarentee that While Richard might entertain the option of a trio with Anita and JC, there is no way in Hell that Micah's going to be invited along.

*grumble* I've got a fic idea in my head about this now and it won't go away...

[taligator.livejournal.com]

I think in the books, she gets hurt but it's normal kinds of hurt. It's not something that shakes her to the core and I think the cruciatus did that, it really tore into her in more ways than one. There's more out there than she knows - it's almost like how she responded to the Mother, something much much greater than her. Make sense?

Yay for foreshadowing!

[houses7177.livejournal.com]

Very telling chapter. You had a lot to deal with, both event wise and person wise. It's hard to manage that many characters in one physical space, but you dealt with it well and without any forced awkwardness. The reader gets the sense that the people who aren't the focus are still doing their thing, just not impacting Harry by doing it. Harry was spectacular. Loved his crippling guilt-again-but also the way he didn't step back. He owned up, and he would have left if they'd asked him to.

Was absolutley enamoured with the way JC flared at Harry. So very very in character for him, and so was Anita's reaction to pull him away. She didn't really believe Harry, none of them did, though Harry tried to warn her. So they finally understand, to their chagrin, and maybe they'll be better equipped to deal in the future.

The bonding at the end with Damian was lovely, if stressed. Harry was back to functioning again, and it was most tender to see. Nicely done.

I have to agree on Micah and Richard- they're on too even a footing for him not to take any encroachment personally. They hold similar rank, and Anita hold similar offical placement. Besides, Micah really does love her- and that's got to sting.

[mhalachai.livejournal.com]

The Harry chapters are the hardest ones, I think... third person Harry is hard, while first person Anita is easy. But if I had written this chapter from Anita's POV, it'd have been murky and confused and really not interesting.

The bonding at the end with Damian was lovely, if stressed.

...Do you mean the situation was stressed, or the writing was stressed?

Besides, Micah really does love her- and that's got to sting.

Indeed. Micah's going to have a bit of a role in the next few chapters... stay tuned.

so grand . . .

[sorceress-death.livejournal.com]

I loved the last update. It's always wonderfully written. Character wise, you never seem to go OOC, which is a relief. ^_^

I like how the AB characters are starting to see that there's more of a danger with Harry than they had thought. Harry tried to warn them, and this happens. I wonder if Richard would blame himself since he helped keep Harry there for his own reasons. The guilt trip about the new wolfy side of Harry.

I love it when Anita acts as she does, even seeming to be a slight bit crazy her views didn't really change. She said she'd protect Harry, and she hasn't changed her mind in the slightest. I wonder how JC felt after she yelled at him for verbally going after Harry.

But it's interesting seeing the characters act that way around Harry now. I wonder how it'll have an effect on how they see him?

Re: so grand . . .

[mhalachaiswords.livejournal.com]

Character wise, you never seem to go OOC, which is a relief. ^_^

I'm always kind of worried about it... never sure if my Harry's veering off to the left. Glad to see the characters read true.

I wonder if Richard would blame himself since he helped keep Harry there for his own reasons.
You mean a patented Zeeman guilt trip(tm)? Hella ya.

But it's interesting seeing the characters act that way around Harry now.
He's not just another kid with tall tales anymore. He's a real danger, a real threat, and they know it now.

[wolfseer.livejournal.com]

Aw, great chapter. It is difficult to have a lot of people in one room in a fanfic, but you pulled it off rather well. I really liked the Damian/Harry bonding at the end. And adding "absolute pants" was hilarious and very apropos for Harry's personality. He reminds me of a cousin of mine, highly embarrassed to be caught saying any of the 'harder' swears in the presence of adults. In fact, the tips of his ears still turn red if he even says pants in front of our grandmum. LOL!

Anyway, looking forward to the next installment. :)

[krichardson.livejournal.com]

Love the chapter. Found the story from beren_writes . I think the story is awesome.

I keep wondering what will happen now. It's such a mystery. I mean there is the death of that old maybe ex-deatheater guy- which was introduced fabulously like LKH style- and now there is Bellatrix Bitch Lestrange.

I spy with my little eye, Voldemort coming soon (maybe- really you can do a lot with the evil bad guy). Oh, I hope Anita gets to kill Lestrange in the end, seems kind of like payback should be arranged even if Harry is also entitled to killing her also.

Sorry, can't help with Micah. I've only read 4 books so far so I don't really know a lot about him.

I friended you. Hope you don't mind.

Karone Richardson

[mhalachaiswords.livejournal.com]

Hey. I'm glad you like the story. I'm not going to be nearly as fast as Beren is with Black Magic (I'm got so many fics on the go), but we'll have some resolutions soon. Sometimes I only wish I could type faster :)